why?
one of my favorite questions to ask is why. especially when people have a choice (generally, at least in this country, most of the time, we do. yes there are some instances when people don’t).
the other day i was talking to someone who had just joined a startup. im very familiar with the startup - i know all of the founders and most of the employees. i was excited for her. i asked her why she made the decision to join.
her answer (paraphrased) was: it’s one of the hottest startups out there, the people are awesome, and ive always thought i wanted to work for a startup.
i told her that was a bad answer and to try again. yes, a bit harsh, i know. she was confused. so, i explained…
the first thing out of your mouth, especially when you have a choice and especially when you’re working for a startup should be: because it is the most important thing that i can be doing right now. it’s going to change the world. if you don’t believe that, and you have a choice, why-oh-why are you doing it?
of course she agreed, changed course and acknowledged this as her primary motivation. i believe her. for some reason we don’t give true/full answers. is it because claiming passion and world-changing to a stranger (or even our friends) is weird? unacceptable? pipe-dreaming?
in a similar vein, when you meet someone where do answers generally start when you or they introduce? i went to school here. i work there. a good friend of mine taught me to ask: what is your story? again, answers generally started at degree, school and job. i immediately stop them (per being taught to) and say: no no. where were you born? what do your parents do? these questions reset the conversation, and i begin to know people.
i guess the first question is to ask yourself why you’re doing the things you’re doing. then, if it’s true, state it. and if you have a choice, i hope that your reasoning isn’t based on social pressures or norms, but rather on being important, on learning and on changing the world.
*one of my favorite quotes having to do with choice:
The definition of the alternatives is the supreme instrument of power. - Elmer Eric Schattschneider
